A Little Law

Lebanon has a personal status law.  This means that for issues involving things like family law and inheritance, a person’s religion determines the applicable law.  For example, a Lebanese man who is Muslim can legally have up to four wives.  On the other hand, a Lebanese man who is Christian can legally have only one.  (It seems universally accepted in Lebanon that a woman can have only one husband at a time.  My explanation of “polyandry” got a lot of laughs at the office.)  According to the Library of Congress, Lebanon allows eighteen religions to have their own laws and courts.  http://www.loc.gov/law/help/lebanon.php

I recently had the opportunity to review some translations of laws concerning the Druze rules for getting married.  The Druze are monotheists who believe in the Qur’an and reincarnation.  Many Muslims, however, do not regard the Druze as Islamic because they do not necessarily do things like fast during Ramadan, pray five times a day, or make a pilgrimage to Mecca.  For more information on the Druze, please see http://www.druze.org.au/religion/index.htm.  As you will see, many of the Druze marriage requirements are similar to marriage requirements in the United States.

Under Druze law, men can marry at age 18 and women can marry at 17. 

If permission is given, a teen boy can marry at age 16 and a teen girl can marry at 15.  This permission needs to come from their “tutors” and the Sheik al-Aql or the Kadi al Mazhab.  (A tutor is “the agnate relative in hierarchical order.”  A tutor cannot be a child, mad, or an “idiot.”  If a person does not have a tutor, the Sheikh or the Kadi serves as tutor.)

If the Sheik or the Kadi gives permission but the tutor does not, it appears that the teens have the right to ask that the marriage be cancelled within six months of the husband’s 17^th birthday or the wife’s 18^th birthday. 

If a woman between 17 and 21 wishes to marry, she must inform the Sheikh or the Kadi who will then inform her tutor.  The Sheikh or Kadi can authorize the marriage if her tutor does not object within 15 days or if he deems the tutor’s objection unjust.

“Idiots” and people with venereal disease, leprosy, and “developing tuberculosis” cannot marry.

A woman cannot marry during her Iddah following her divorce.  (“Iddah” is a waiting period to find out whether a woman is pregnant with her former spouse’s child.)

A man can have one wife.

A man cannot remarry a former spouse or a woman within “the forbidden degrees of relative kinship.”

Again, one’s religion is extremely important in Lebanon.  According to my colleague, a person must officially declare a religion in Lebanon if he or she wishes to participate in public life, i.e., vote, run for office, marry, etc.  (My other “big joke” at the office came when I asked what happens when people are atheists.  The idea that someone would not have a religion is almost as funny as the idea of a woman with multiple husbands.)

My Life in Lebanon

O.K., this post is not really about my LIFE.  The title for today's post is an allusion to Julia Child's memoir, My Life in France.  So as you have likely guessed by now, this post is about cooking.

Last week I had a little mishap at the grocery store that almost resulted in my buying meat in a can.  You see, Bill (the regular cook) is at the university during the day.  This means that I am on my own for breakfast and lunch.  Breakfast is not a problem: tea, yogurt, and pita with cheese.  Lunch, however, is tricky.  For the most part, I just go out and get a sandwich or something.  Last week though, I felt like I should try to make something because it seems like all the eating out is eating up my cash.

So I walked to my corner TSC without a particular lunch design.  I considered boxed mac & cheese, but it was more expensive than getting a hot delicious sandwich.  I went through the aisles and had no idea what to do with most of the stuff for sale.  Just when I had decided to get a can of corned beef from the Philippines, it occurred to me that I could make pesto.  Danger averted.

But a girl can't live off pesto alone, so this weekend Bill and I bought a couple of Lebanese cookbooks.   And I am pleased to report that today I made shorbet adas (lentil soup) and tabbouleh (parsley salad) all by myself!  Mistakes were made (did not cook the onion for the soup long enough, thought the black pepper in the cupboard was cumin until it was too late, got a lot of stem in my salad), but I feel I learned from the mistakes and will do better next time.  And despite the mistakes, I got pretty high marks from Bill who ate the leftovers after school. 

I would post the recipes here since they are easy enough for a Nicole to make, but I fear the copyright holder would take action against me.  So, any of my faithful readers are welcome to come to my house when I get back for soup and salad.  Just give me plenty of notice so I have enough time to cook the onion properly.

From Syria with Love

Some visitors to Damascus will never forget the beauty of the Umayyad Mosque, others will never forget the quality and breadth of the antiquities at the National Museum, but I will never forget the War of the Escalope.  For those of you unfamiliar with this serious conflict, please allow me to explain . . .

Bill and I signed up to take a guided tour of Damascus with a Lebanese tour company.  On our trip with us was a single guy from Miami, an older French couple, and a German couple about our age.  We also had a Lebanese driver (totally awesome) and a Syrian guide (suspected snake, but more about that later).

After we got to Damascus, I quickly developed a dislike for the Germans.  As part of our tour, we went to the Umayyad Mosque.  According to Lonely Planet, the mosque is one of the ten most holy sites for Muslims.  In addition to being an important historical site, people come here for services and prayer.

Because it is a mosque, there are some restrictions on what people can and cannot wear.  Men cannot wear shorts.  No one can wear shoes.  Women must cover their heads and arms.  They must also wear a skirt.  Although I was prepared for the hijab and sleeve requirements, I had to get a skirt.  Luckily the mosque has skirts, robes, and scarves that it lends to people so that they can tour the mosque.

The German woman, however, freaked!  She actually threw a fit at the entrance to the mosque and refused to wear the clothing.  The tour guide finally told her that she did not have to go inside.  Eventually, however, she relented (perhaps once she saw that the French lady and I had suited up without incident).  In case you can’t tell, I was very disgusted.

After touring the mosque, we went for lunch.  For some reason, the guide took us to an Italian restaurant.  The couples on the trip sat at a table and the guide and driver decided to sit off on their own (single guy decided to take a cab and eat at the Four Seasons).  Because lunch was included with the trip, we were only given three choices: lasagna, shish tawook, and escalope.  Everyone at my table except German man ordered shish tawook, he ordered escalope. 

After the waiter brought the drinks, German man pulled out a light green flask.  He handed it to German woman who took three quick nips and handed it back to him.  I was in shock!  I first thought: “Can you drink alcohol in Syria?  Are we going to be arrested?”  I next thought: “You brought alcohol to a mosque?”  Appalling!

When the waiter brought out the food, he had six plates of shish tawook.  It looked pretty good, so German man said nothing about his escalope and started hoovering the shish.  After a few minutes, snaky guide came over and demanded to know who had ordered the escalope.  When questioned directly about whether he ordered the escalope, the German man said “No.” 

After we left the restaurant, snaky guide started yelling at me about who ordered the escalope.  I confirmed that it was the German guy.  When the Germans caught up with the group, snaky guide had it out with them.  I just kind of walked away uncomfortably.  The last thing I heard was snaky guide saying, “I do not like to have to eat things I do not like,” and the German woman saying, “A person cannot eat two dinners.”  The War of the Escalope, however, continued off and on for the rest of the afternoon. 

Going back to snaky guide . . .

On the way to the souk (market), I asked snaky guide what we could expect to pay for certain items like tablecloths (the guide book said they were nice and inexpensive).  He said that he would take me to his friend’s shop who would give me a great deal.  (Notice that he did not state a price.)  Excited by the promise of getting the best deals at the market and temporarily getting Lebanese pounds confused with Syrian pounds ($1 = 1,500 Lebanese or 45 Syrian) I almost agreed to buy three tablecloths for 14,000 Syrian pounds ($311).

I was really furious, and snaky guide was mad that I did not buy anything from his friend.  “You will not find a better price today.”  Then snaky guide took us to another shop.  Again, the prices were outrageous.  I quickly ran to another shop and saw that the prices were much lower at the non-friends of snaky guide shops.  (Not low enough for me though . . .)  And please note that in a souk of over fifty shops, we only had time to visit the two shops belong to snaky guide’s pals.  I was so mad!

Later in the day, snaky guide asked me about the hunt for tablecloths.  I told him that I had the opportunity to get the exact same cloths for $22.00 (I would run into places along the street while we were walking to different sites).  To save face, he tried telling me that my less expensive finds must have been made in an inferior region of the country.  Whatever!

Despite my rage over someone thinking that I was stupid enough to pay over $100 for a tablecloth (which lasted for several hours), I found Syria to be a nice country to visit.  I do not know if I need to go again, but I am glad that I got the chance to see it.

Oh and by the way, I was surprised that night when I saw “escalope de poulet” on the menu at the restaurant around the block from our place.  “Escalope de poulet” is basically French for “chicken cutlet.”  Of course I had to order it after all of the hubbub.  It was very delicious and certainly not worth going to war over!

To see pictures of our trip, please go to http://picasaweb.google.com/104107930952939701195/NicoleAndBillVisitDamascusOctober92010#

What's New?

Quite a bit has happened since my last post. 

First, Bill and I went on our first trip out of the city last weekend.  We traveled south to Tyre with a fun and inexpensive tour company, Vamos Todos.  We had a great time swimming in the Mediterranean, seeing Roman ruins, and visiting the first Christian church in Lebanon (circa 130 A.D.).  We also had totally delicious ice cream in Sidon.  The ice cream alone was worth the price of the trip!  Here is a link to our photos from the trip: http://picasaweb.google.com/104107930952939701195/NicoleAndBillVisitTyreAndQana#

Second, I am going to start Arabic lessons next week at Lebanese American University (not Bill's school).  I met with my instructor two days ago and told her: 1) I wanted to study Modern Classical Arabic so that I could speak to all people of the Middle East (not colloquial Lebanese) and 2) I did not want to spend any time writing--the Arabic alphabet has 28 letters, but most of the letters change shape a little depending on where they are in the word.  I really emphasized that speaking was what was important to me.  The teacher said, "O.K., we will spend one class a week on classical and one class a week on colloquial.  You will also learn to write."  Sometimes it is not worth fighting people here, so I agreed but shorted my contract from 40 hours to 10 hours.  This way I can get out quick if this is not working for me. 

Third, on October 18th I will begin teaching English twice a week as part of a community outreach program though the American University of Beirut (Bill's school).  I will be teaching people who want to take the TOEFL test to get into college but can't afford a prep class.  I was assigned to level one, so my students likely have no knowledge of English.  I hope I do a good job!  Here is a link to pictures of AUB: http://picasaweb.google.com/104107930952939701195/AmericanUniversityOfBeirut#

Fourth, and maybe most important, I got a volunteer position with Justicia for Development & Human Rights.  Justicia is an NGO that works to promote gender equality and human rights in Lebanon and the Middle East.  One of its recent projects involved getting Lebanese mothers the right to open bank accounts on behalf of their children.  I believe that I will be doing legal research and writing, assisting with conference presentations, grant writing, and providing support for litigation pending here and abroad.  Again, I hope I do a good job!  Justicia's website if you are interested in taking a closer look: www.justiciadh.org/

*Please keep in mind that Bill writes the captions for the photos!